Senior cat “Very Old Kevin” from Melbourne, Australia, first appeared on Instagram in August 2019 after adoption. Before that, he lived as a street cat and ended up in Forever Friends Animal Rescue and foster care.
Immediately, you can see this cat has seen a lot in his life, but his age is unknown. According to a vet, he’s over ten but appears ancient, perhaps 1,000. Even so, he looks very much like Daniel Striped Tiger from Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.
Daniel Striped Tiger made his first appearance on this date in 1954. Happy birthday Daniel! pic.twitter.com/Gs0M3WdwlY
— MisterRogersQuotes (@MisterRogersSay) April 5, 2020
These aren’t the bright eyes of a young cat but ones that have weathered many storms. Kevin’s fur is always rumpled, he’s missing a tail, his ears are snipped, and his mouth turns downward like a “dignified man of noble pursuits.”
What is Very Old Kevin Thinking?
As is immediately evident, Very Old Kevin exudes character, and one wonders what he’s thinking. His human Lisa Dib offers a glimpse with her clever, witty, and hilarious captions.
“Mother is clearly making fun of me, little does she know I was a much sought-after model in my day. Why, I graced the cover of Fishwife Monthly on more than one occasion.”
Below, you can see what Kevin looked like when Mother first met him.
“Mother tells me this is the first photograph she took of me, back in the days when I was too wary of her intentions and would refuse to come out of my litter box. Of course, nowadays I am extremely brave and fancy-free.”
How Kevin Sees Himself
You can almost hear Very Old Kevin’s voice, a distinguished gentleman. Although he’s not a “strapping young punk” anymore, resembling more of a “dusty wombat,” he still sees himself as the most handsome and fearsome predator with a mighty roar.
“I am the paragon of beauty and grace, come to me, and I shall show you everything golden in the world. Blep.”
Sometimes, Kevin’s Mother follows him around, snapping pictures, and he responds to her accordingly.
“Now just what are YOU lookin’ at, ya dozey mare? A man’s got a right to nap in peace without some TEEN snapping his likeness! Go on, git!”
Although he seems cantankerous, Very Old Kevin is quite loveable and demands plenty of affection. But don’t muss up his hair.
“Have you no decency? How DARE you cease petting me before I deem necessary? Why, you should consider yourself BLESSED to be able to SCRITCH my FUZZ.”
Likewise, he must protest if deprived for any length of time of his favorite treats like biscuits or, better filet mignon.
“I want the finest biscuits available to humanity, and I want them here, and I want them now!”
“I grow ever more impatient with your excuses, Mother. Oh, you claim there is no need for you to refill my bowl simply because it is “already full”? Sounds like the ravings of a SCOUNDREL.”
A Gentleman of Leisure
Aside from snacks and retiring to a sunny window or behind the television, this gentleman of leisure isn’t generally one for exerting his energy on silly things like play.
No, this old chap takes a ramp to “Mount Bed,” and can’t jump around like he used to. Instead, he prefers to lounge, accepting a salmon mouse or patè and occasional belly rub.
“I understand you’d like me to…what was it? Play? I don’t know what that is. You’re talking crazy talk. A cat should only ever LOUNGE and SNACK.”
Dreaming in the Sunshine
These days, old Kevin spends his time dreaming of a perfect world with “streets paved with turkey legs,” and salmon grows on trees. In the meantime, he’s happy to receive ample adoration from Mother and his employees.
“I rather like this spot, it allows me to enjoy some much-needed sunshine while remaining out of your reach, Mother. Don’t snap me now, I need as much warmth as I can get on these old bones.”
“Sleeping in the sunshine behind the telly, where no-one can reach me, is one of the few things I enjoy, aside from Every Snack and a good scratchin’.”
Very Old Kevin’s Advice for Life
If Kevin has advice for life, it’s quite simple: “Worship Kevin,” and “It is imperative to remain cozy at all times.”
In that pursuit, he has been seen cuddling a huge teddy bear named Djungelskog.
“Kevin and Djungelskog: a love story.”
Although Kevin may appear cuddly himself, don’t give him a nose boop, or you will be sorry.
“I’ll have you know, booping the nose of a cat of my status is punishable by death…or a severe glowering.”
Failure to provide ample head scratches may have consequences:
“Is it my imagination, or did you just stop scratching my head? I highly doubt you’d do something so foolish, knowing full well how aptly I can wreak my revenge. I can have this whole house covered in cat hair in just 8-10 months you know.”
This charismatic kitty shows how adopting a senior cat can bring many memorable and charming moments. To see more, you can follow Very Old Kevin on Instagram.